11 pieces of Etsy food jewelry that will make you hungry
Trolling food websites when you’re hungry is like touching that paper cut on your finger just to make sure it still hurts. You kind of just have to do it.
Food jewelry falls under the same category of senseless, necessary pain. It’s hard enough to sit at your desk while you’re stomach is growling at 10:30 in the morning, so why not make things worse by wearing a reminder of your hunger?
Maybe a necklace with a fried chicken charm to remind you that grease from that crispy chicken wing isn’t actually in your hand; a sushi ring to let you know there isn’t a real spicy tuna roll or chopsticks within reach; or a complete miniature banana bread oven ring set to make you wish you could smell it baking in the oven.
Photos: Etsy items that will make you hungry
Here’s a list of 11 pieces of food jewelry on Etsy that will make you hungry. Just remember to not eat the jewelry off your fingers. Eating plastic, or metal, is bad for you.
1. Maki and Ebi lovely sushi ring: It’s hard not to love pieces of fresh fish on sweet sushi rice at your favorite sushi spot. And it’s even harder to not love it when it’s in the form of a miniature sushi platter on a ring. The ring includes a polymer clay version of tuna maki, futo maki, california rolls, ikura and ebi, lemon, wasabi, cucumber, rolled hamachi and sakura leaves. It sells for $12.50, soy sauce not included.
2. Double cheeseburger, with bacon, cuff links: Because regular double cheeseburger cuff links aren’t enough. You need to add bacon to them. These mini burgers ($53.55) look just like the real thing with a sesame bun, patty, two slices of cheese and of course, bacon. You can also customize your own burger fixings.
3. Canneloni bracelet: Every Italian-food lover needs a rubber bracelet with a charm that looks like a plate of mom’s meaty, saucy, cheesy, baked cannelloni ($29) -- for those days when you’d rather stare at cannelloni the size of a staple than actually eat it.
4. Chicken-and-waffles necklace: If you’re a fried chicken addict, which many are, you may not be able to handle this necklace ($10). The sight of a piece of fried chicken and a buttered waffle around your neck every time you catch your reflection in the mirror, or even a window, may be too much for you.
5. S’more ring: The favorite campfire treat, on a ring ($25). The chocolate looks melted, the marshmallow ready to ooze and stick to your fingers and the graham cracker slightly bent and about to crumble.
6. Bacon-in-a-bottle pendant: The only way this mini-bottle-of-bacon pendant could get any better is if, when you opened it, it actually smelled like bacon. Until then, it’s still fun to open the top, take out the pieces of bacon and wish they were real. Thirteen dollars is a small price to pay for endless days of faux-pork-filled fun.
7. Poutine-and-fork ring: Poutine, the Canadian French fry dish, is made with brown gravy and cheese curds. Out of all the items you can wear on your finger, poutine has to be one of the strangest. This ring ($25) gets points for simply existing.
8. Blueberry muffin charm: Just looking at it, you can almost taste the blueberries and the crystallized sugar atop a real blueberry muffin. The charm ($8) captures that soft, warm, crumbly texture of a freshly baked muffin.
9. Pretzel earrings: With their specks of salt and dollops of spicy mustard, these earrings ($27) look good enough to eat. And in case you were wondering, they also have far fewer calories than the soft pretzels you get at a ball game.
10. Banana-bread-maker necklace: Why anyone thought it would be a good idea to make an entire replica ($30.53) of an oven, with a tray of cinnamon rolls sticking out of it and a counter of everything you’d need to make chocolate chip banana bread is beyond me. But it is cute, and it does encourage a craving for cinnamon rolls and banana bread.
11. Miso soup ring: Miso soup on a ring ($12.50)? It’s a no-brainer.
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