Typing such a deal for former Dodgers executive Steve Soboroff

Steve Soboroff, have I got a deal for you …

Dodgers fans must remember Soboroff, whose tenure with the Dodgers was brief but, as they say, memorable.

On the list of Frank McCourt acts of desperation, Soboroff would merely earn a mention. Still, hiring him last year as the vice chairman of whatever, will always be noteworthy, if only for what they say about flames that burn brightest.

The day after Soboroff was hired one year ago Thursday and declared “Frank McCourt is financially fine” -- hey, he was a man ahead of his time! -- Major League Baseball seized the team and cut him off at the, er, pass. Ah, the memories.

Two disastrous months later Soboroff resigned, leaving no one to walk around Dodger Stadium and hand out pins. Two days after that, McCourt took the Dodgers into Bankruptcy Court.

Not that Soboroff exactly disappeared into the mist. He became a senior advisor for the arrival of the retired space shuttle Endeavour at the California Science Center and continued his passion for collecting typewriters of the famous and infamous.

That led to this, an A1 story in Wednesday’s Times about Soboroff’s typewriter collection. Sadly, 320 million words and not a mention of his career as a Dodgers executive. Still, very interesting stuff.

Steve, if you are reading this, I loved the part about how you got started in all this by outbidding The Times for Jim Murray’s typewriter. Not only do you kick The Times’ butt, but they write a glowing story about it! Who doesn’t love America?

The story said you had 15 classic typewriters and are looking for more. Man, are you in luck. I own a typewriter! Seriously, I have three kids to put through college. For you, such a deal.

I also own a vintage Remington Porto-Rite model with leather case and everything I picked up 20 years ago at the Golden West Community College swap meet that the seller swore Einstein used to write his theory of relativity. Or maybe it was Ben Stein’s commercials for FreeScore.com. I get so confused.

There are probably tons of others to nab you just haven’t considered. Why, you could own two Frank McCourt models, one that wrote “Angela’s Ashes” and another that typed Jamie McCourt’s termination letter.

There must be all kinds of interesting typewriters just hanging around Dodger Stadium. Go for the Ned Colletti edition, the one that produced contracts for Andruw Jones and Jason Schmidt. Maybe there’s still a typewriter around that produced the first contracts for Jackie Robinson, Vin Scully and Sandy Koufax. Somewhere there’s a model that typed the letters telling all those residents of Chavez Ravine to pack up.

Did Vladimir Shpunt ever type, or did he just communicate telepathically? Has the typewriter that produced the Pedro Martinez trade been bronzed? The typewriter that told Dodgertown it could no longer call itself Dodgertown?

Listen, I have a million ideas. Really, we should hook up. Did I mention I have three kids to put through college? Just think of it as kicking The Times’ butt again. Such symmetry.

RELATED:

Matt Kemp’s tear with Dodgers is now breaking recordsChad Billingsley stumbles, recovers, but Dodgers ultimately fall

Try and get your arms around idea of Peter O’Malley owning Padres

Typing such a deal for ex-Dodgers executive Steve Soboroff