CMA Awards 2012: All the performances as they happen

Welcome, country music fans.

What follows will be instant grades of every performance at tonight’s Country Music Assn. Awards. This post is written off-site from the CMAs at the LAT HQ, and strives to be as fast and accurate as possible. On tap at the show are performances from the likes of Jason Aldean, Faith Hill, Blake Shelton, Taylor Swift and Carrie Underwood, among others.

This will be updated constantly throughout the night. There may be typos. Enough preamble.

Jason Aldean, Luke Bryan & Eric Church, “The Only Way I Know.” The CMA Awards got off to a workmanlike start. As the East Coast recovers from Hurricane Sandy, Aldean and Church kept things simple and straightforward with this sleeves-rolled-up anthem. A nearly romanticized ode to hard, blue-collar work, Aldean sang of soaking in the rain, baking in the sun and getting things done with one’s back against the fence. It’s stronger in the hands of Aldean, who’s a little rougher around the edges. But co-hosts Carrie Underwood and Brad Paisley soon took the show down a more lighthearted path, poking fun at Swift, referencing Maroon 5 and doing a little “Gangnam Style” dance. The first 10 minutes captured the line this show will attempt to walk between county and pop. Grade: B.

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Tim McGraw, “One of Those Nights.” The CMA Awards suddenly took a rather steamy turn about 20 minutes in. McGraw’s new single, “One of Those Nights,” is all about grown-up seduction. The mid-tempo slow-dance — from McGraw’s as-yet-unreleased new album “Two Lanes of Freedom” — is close-up image after close-up image of putting on lipstick, whispering in one’s ear and getting out of a party. Yet it’s all coated in nostalgia. McGraw keeps the song flourish-free, and it only works because it seems to recall moments past, not moments happening. Grade: B.

Miranda Lambert, “Fastest Girl in Town.” As someone who has championed Lambert in the past, “Fastest Girl in Town” leaves me defenseless. This is Lambert’s look-at-me-I’m-crazy shtick at most predictable. There are references to guns, bullets, booze, fast cars and any other country music-meets-action-movie cliche you can think up. Although her outfit, which looked like a stained-glass window made of plastic, may lend some credence to her claims of beings nuts. Grade: D.

Zac Brown Band’s “Goodbye In Her Eyes,” followed by Dierks Bentley’s “Tip It On Back.” The performances are coming too fast for the ol’ Pop & Hiss to keep up. Unfortunately, it’s mid-tempo song after mid-tempo song at this point. At least this one-two sleepy punch went from a tearjerker to a tear-drowner. The CMAs are nothing if not tidy. Grade: C.

The Band Perry, “Better Dig.” The CMA Awards are getting heavy on promotion at this point, as the Band Perry is here to perform a song from the group’s as-yet-unreleased second album. “Better Dig” isn’t so much a country number as it is mainstream Nashville trying to mimic Mumford & Sons. This is a plucky, slow-build banjo anthem, and it at least upped the energy of the show. Grade: C+.

Eric Church, “Springsteen.” Detractors of Bruce Springsteen will point out that his songs feel nostalgic for an America that never was — a glorification of the working class and political references that are vague enough so as not to offend. Far worse than any of that is a nostalgic song about being nostalgic for Springsteen songs. Grade: F.

Eli Young Band, “Keep On Dreaming.” For those of you who have purchased a card that, say, congratulates a young graduate — Congratulations! Dream big! Good luck! — and have thought, “Boy oh boy, I sure wish this were a three-minute song with acoustic guitars instead of a card,” here you go. Grade: D.

Taylor Swift, “Begin Again.” Swift’s new record, “Red,” wants to have it all, ranging from strummy ballads such as “Begin Again” and more rock-pop numbers such as “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together.” She’s becoming a country-tinged chameleon, able to fit in with all spectrums of the Top-40 landscape as needed. She kept it light and airy at the CMAs, and while it’s never a good idea to place the words “James Taylor” in a song, she’s a likable enough personality that her colorfully anonymous lyrical details can at least hold the listener’s interest. Although her dress may or may not have been an ad for Target, the Paris-via-Epcot backdrop was pretty to look at. Grade: B.

Little Big Town, “Pontoon.” Sample lyric: “Mmmmmmm ... motorboating.” The cheesy, ‘70s-inspired blue-wave effects captured the right vibe — the vibe of being trapped on a cruise ship that you can’t escape from. Grade: C (It would have been lower, but admittedly the blue-wave effects were kind of fascinating).

Luke Bryan, “Kiss Tomorrow Goodbye.” Sporting a baseball cap and a black, skin-tight V-neck, Bryan, unlike Tim McGraw, got right to the point. “All we do right is make love,” he sang, and it got a little more cringe-inducing after that. Or maybe, when Bryan sings of laying down and kissing tomorrow goodbye, he’s talking of a double suicide, turning this into a tragic tale of two lovers driven insane by their own affections. Or maybe it’s just cheese. Grade: D.

Hunter Hayes, “Wanted.” Not quite sure why this was on a country show. Hayes’ slick piano dreck is more suited for “The Voice” or “The X Factor.” Grade: F.

Faith Hill, “American Heart.” In case the message of this yay-America cheerleading number was lost, Hill dipped into a little of “God Bless America” at the end. Before that, though, Hill goes on a rather earnest tour of the country she just can’t get enough of, referencing New Orleans, Detroit and high school football. It’s fine, as far as these things go. Grade: B-.

Brantley Gilbert, “Country Must Be Country Wide.” Country artists, please, stop singing about how great country music is or all the James Taylor or Bruce Springsteen records in your collection. Enough. Write some songs about other things. And leave the word “America” out of it too. Grade: F.

Keith Urban and Zac Brown, “Georgia Woods.” “Initially I was excited when Urban appeared on stage. The backdrop went dark, and what appeared to be a Bat signal went up behind him. But no, this was not an extended preview of the upcoming home-video release for “The Dark Knight Rises.” Those were not bats, just birds, but Urban as a guitar player has few peers on this show and stops short of showboating. Urban keeps the song at an anticipatory gallop. Grade: B-.

Brad Paisley, “Southern Comfort Zone.” Paisley doesn’t get enough credit for his hosting skills. He’s funny, and he also has the rare ability to poke fun at his peers and smile his way out of it. That sense of humor permeates his stronger songs, and “Southern Comfort Zone” finally brought a bit of nuance to the proceedings. It takes a wide-angle-lens view of America (“Not everybody owns a gun,” he sings) and captures the mix of fear and excitement most of us experience when they leave their hometowns. Grade: B+.

Carrie Underwood, “Blown Away.” Brad Paisley’s co-host went all “Snow White & the Huntsman” for her performance — with glitter, of course. It was dark and icy, and so was the singer. Underwood hasn’t learned how to do subtle, which is why she’s best when she skips the ballads and brings a little rock ‘n’ roll edge to her sound. Grade: B.

Jason Aldean, “Take a Little Ride.” Country’s bad boy who isn’t — how tough can you be if your song has name brands? — kept it fast and polished for another song that seems to seduce with ulterior motives. Grade: C.

Kelly Clarkson & Vince Gill, “Don’t Rush.” “An idol and an icon,” said Carrie Underwood, introducing the song from Clarkson’s upcoming greatest-hits collection (ambitiously titled “Greatest Hits: Chapter One”). It’s a sweet lil’ ol’ fashioned number that seems like it’s rescued from the long-lost days of AM radio. Gill plays a side role, but Clarkson sings to his groove. Grade: B+.

Kenny Chesney, “Come Over.” Earlier Little Big Town sang a song for a cruise boat in “Pontoon” and later the CMAs showcased country’s answer to Jimmy Buffet in Chesney. The touring powerhouse showcased one of his more serious songs tonight, and “Come Over” is all regret and yearning. It’s Chesney at his more traditional, which is Chesney at his best. Grade: B.

Tribute to Willie Nelson: No gripes here, but nothing all that revelatory, either. This Grammy-like medley featured few surprises and lots of faithfulness (no, that’s not a pun). Lady Antebellum kept it understated, Blake Shelton and Keith Urban had more vitality than usual, Faith Hill and Tim McGraw could have used a little more stage time, but Willie himself singing “On the Road Again” (of course) was the main draw. Songs featured were “You Were Always On My Mind,” “Crazy,” “Whiskey River” and “Good Hearted Woman.” If anything, would have rather seen a whole segment with just Willie. Grade: B+.

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