He claimed 10 women defamed him in 'Are we dating the same guy?' group - Los Angeles Times
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He claimed 10 women defamed him in online ‘Are we dating the same guy?’ group. An L.A. court is skeptical

Defendants address a lawsuit involving comments about a man on a Facebook group called “Are We Dating The Same Guy?”
Defendants hold a news conference March 20 to discuss a lawsuit over comments they made on a Facebook group called “Are we dating the same guy?”
(KTLA-TV)
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Dating can be difficult. What if you get stood up? What if you are not compatible? What if you get a fake phone number?

And then there is the case of Stewart Lucas Murrey, who sued a group of women after they talked about him in a private Facebook group, warning others about his bad behavior on dating apps.

The lawsuit names as defendants 10 women, but a Los Angeles superior court judge recently tossed out the suit against one. Murrey vows to pursue the legal squabble.

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Murrey, a Santa Monica resident, said his social status took a hit because of the comments made by women whom he claims to have met through dating apps. His June 2023 lawsuit, filed in Los Angeles Superior Court, accused the women of defamation and seeks $2 million in damages. He claims sex-based discrimination because he couldn’t join the Facebook group to respond to the claims made against him and alleges a civil conspiracy.

Murrey said he was labeled a murderer, and the women accused him of having a sexually transmitted infection, according to his complaint.

On Monday, Judge Gregory Keosian dismissed Murrey’s lawsuit against one woman after she filed an anti-SLAPP motion, which targets lawsuits that seek to censor, intimidate and silence critics.

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Murrey’s lawsuit is centered around the Facebook group “Are we dating the same guy? — Los Angeles.” The group has iterations across the United States. The first started in 2022, according to the online magazine Glamour, serving as a “whisper network” to help women navigate the dating scene in their cities. The Los Angeles group was not created specifically to discuss Murrey, but he was the subject of a message thread, according to court records.

The court found that X Corp.’s lawsuit was about punishing the watchdog group’s speech for criticizing the social media platform.

March 25, 2024

Women on the Los Angeles-centered Facebook group shared in a post what they described as negative experiences with Murrey, according to a GoFundMe campaign started by the defendants to pay legal fees.

One woman shared a story about an exchange she allegedly had with Murrey after the two matched on the Tinder app. He insisted on meeting her that evening, but she was busy, according to a screenshot of her comment. Murrey allegedly found her Instagram page and tracked her down at a Beverly Hills hotel bar, where she was having a business meeting.

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Another woman, Vanessa Valdes, threatened to report Murrey when he allegedly insulted her in a message conversation on the dating app Hinge, according to a series of screenshots shared in her anti-SLAPP motion.

“I’m subpoenaing you’re (sic) idiot ‘report’ and possibly suing you for defamation,” Murrey wrote in response, according to screenshots produced for the anti-SLAPP motion.

“By the way, real decent women love me lol,” Murrey added.

More than 50 women wrote about him in the private Facebook group and were labeled co-conspirators in a “large-scale conspiracy to create a fake online social consensus,” according to Murrey’s lawsuit.

Keosian dismissed all claims against Valdes during a hearing Monday on her anti-SLAPP motion and found no evidence of a conspiracy. Legal experts say it’s likely the other named parties in the lawsuit will have similar success.

Valdes’ posts “involved a matter of public interest: women’s security against male violence and harassment,” Keosian wrote in his ruling. In one message posted to the Facebook group, Valdes wrote, “I’m so glad we’re protecting each other.”

“Just feels really good to be dismissed from all counts — it wasn’t just the two counts of defamation, but all 11 counts he filed against me,” Valdes told KTLA after the hearing.

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Murrey posted his response to Monday’s ruling on a blockchain social media platform and on his personal website. He claimed he did not know Valdes aside from their one interaction on the Hinge app and called her a cyberbully who shared his personal information online.

“This behavior should not be normalized and I am challenging every person in their various roles,” Murrey said, promising to pursue his legal case.

This is not the first time Murrey has taken legal action to accuse a woman of causing him emotional distress. In 2019, he sued a woman he met on Tinder, making similar claims of defamation.

Murrey represented himself in his latest lawsuit. Several other named defendants have upcoming anti-SLAPP hearings in the case, and Murrey will have an opportunity to appeal the court’s recent ruling.

Malpractice attorney Frances O’Meara, who is not affiliated with Murrey’s lawsuit, said that in an anti-SLAPP motion, the court must first consider if a person is being sued while exercising their right to free speech. If so, then the burden shifts back to the person filing the lawsuit, and the question becomes whether the claim has minimal merit to proceed.

California was the first state to pass an anti-SLAPP law, in 1992, to target lawsuits that abuse the judicial system.

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“The statute then expanded to situations of people suing just to shut other people down when they certainly have a right to speak,” O’Meara said.

Anytime people say something on the internet, they put themselves at risk of being sued, said attorney Jeffrey Lewis, who is not affiliated with the Murrey case.

In order to succeed in his defamation lawsuit, Murrey would have had to prove that the statements made about him were false and that he suffered damages, Lewis said.

“Defamation lawsuits are really hard, unlike going to small claims over a breach-of-contract case, or somebody owes you money,” Lewis said. “People get sued all the time for saying things on Facebook, but a group of women posting about a dating experience with one guy, and the one guy deciding to respond with a lawsuit? It’s very unusual.”

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