COAST TO COAST

Hang on to that sense of humor

Things went from bad to worst to worst-ever for the Spurs, whose Big Three went to One in Friday’s loss to Miami, which hadn’t won in San Antonio in 10 years, with Tony Parker joining Manu Ginobili on the injured list.

In a timeout huddle with Tim Duncan, George Tolliver, George Hill, Desmon Farmer and Roger Mason, an ESPN camera picked up Coach Gregg Popovich joking, “Who are all you guys?”

After the huddle broke up, Duncan stayed behind to introduce himself.

“Tim Duncan,” he said, extending his hand. “I’ve been here 11 years.”

“Yeah, I know,” Popovich said. “Play with these young guys.”

Say goodbye to the bad boys

Another powerhouse blew itself up last week, but there’s a difference between the Pistons, the six-time East finalists running who traded Chauncey Billups, and the Suns, who led the West at 34-15 last season when they acquired Shaquille O’Neal.

The Pistons’ time was running out and President Joe Dumars wanted to get younger and play faster.

The Suns, who pioneered the new open-court style, went back the other way, getting older and slower.

As Detroit’s loss to New Jersey in Allen Iverson’s debut suggests, this might not work for this season.

Still, the likeliest outcome is Iverson taking a pay cut to re-sign, keeping the Pistons under the cap to pursue one more big piece down the road (Chris Bosh?)

In any case, it’s better to mess up going forward than backward.

Free Dice!

If Antonio McDyess was upset at being traded to Denver with Billups to make the money work, there’s now a bidding war for him.

Cut loose by Denver after telling the Nuggets he wouldn’t report, McDyess is now reportedly sought by 18 teams -- there are only 30 -- including:

Boston -- McDyess is 34 but at 44 he’d be an upgrade over Glen (Big Baby) Davis.

Cleveland -- Ben Wallace and Anderson Varejao average 15 rebounds and 2.2 blocks but only 7.8 points. Their defender is the one helping out on LeBron James.

Detroit -- The favorites in the clubhouse, in the old Brent Barry Turnaround.

Free Steph!

On the other hand, there’s New York’s martyred former pariah Stephon Marbury, told to stay home until the team can find him a new one, who asked to work out with his old high school team in Coney Island.

Said President Donnie Walsh, less than charmed: “I’ve got nothing to say about it.”

Jerry Sloan, in spite of himself

It’s no accident Jerry Sloan, who won his 1,000th game with the Jazz on Friday, is the NBA’s longest serving, most respected and least-remarked-upon coach.

Sloan is like one of those heads on Mt. Rushmore, no less hard-nosed and no more talkative about his least favorite subject: himself.

“I’ve been lucky to be a coach,” he said last week of his upcoming milestone. “It’s not something that I’ll do cartwheels over.”

Sloan trails only Lenny Wilkens, Don Nelson and Pat Riley in wins. Before Sloan, the most any coach had won with one team was Red Auerbach’s 995 in Boston.

Knowing Sloan, the Jazz marked No. 1,000 with the kind of ceremony he would appreciate: none.