Dog days:Dove Audio Inc., the company that...

Dog days:

Dove Audio Inc., the company that blessed us with tell-all tomes from Faye Resnick and former Simpson juror Michael Knox, has formed a film division. Dove has acquired a library of more than 80 feature films from Skouras Pictures--including “My Life as a Dog.” We predict a remake of that movie, starring Kato the Akita.

HOW’S THAT AGAIN? Our item on the weird questions that tourists ask the Catalina Island Chamber of Commerce--i.e., “Do I need a passport?”--prompted a letter from Jim Lantry of San Diego.

“I guess tourists will be tourists no matter where they are,” Lantry concluded. As proof, he sent along an article from Governing magazine, which contains unusual queries received in other areas.

For instance:

* “Which beach is closest to the water?” (Florida Space Coast Office of Tourism)

* “What’s the best time of the year to watch a deer turn into an elk?” (Denver Visitors Bureau)

* “Where can we find Amish hookers?” (Pennsylvania Dutch Convention and Visitor Bureau)

No, we don’t think the person seeking hookers was a British actor.

The magazine said that caller actually “wanted to buy a quilt.”

MYSTERY OF THE DAY: It’s the license plates on two cars parked on a seemingly tranquil, tree-lined little street in bucolic Pacific Palisades. One says, H8 W8N, the other, H8 W8EN.

SECOND LIVES: An archeologist exploring L.A. would find evidence that life did exist in Southern California, even before Disneyland was built.

There’s the old Helms Bakery Building, with its “Olympic Bread” reference to the 1932 Olympics. It now houses a nightclub, the Jazz Bakery.

There’s the Dr. Beauchamp dental office in Santa Monica, whose sign is topped by a toothless bird. A penguin. The building once was the site of the Penguin Cafe.

And there’s the former Currie’s ice cream shop in Montebello, onetime home of the 15-cent “mile-high” cone (see photo). The current business there sells clothing, not cones. But it still calls itself Krazy Kone. It was that or 31 sizes.

WELL, IT’S THE PRINCIPLE THAT COUNTS: John Burgess of Upland and several other readers sent us a photograph from a local paper that showed two elementary students protesting the demotion of their principal. They were carrying a sign that said: “We Want Are Principal Back.”

ANAGRAM OF THE DAY: Ron Matejcek of Claremont offers what sounds like an admonition to witnesses--or jurors.

LANCE ITO--O, CAN’T LIE.

miscelLAny Has Dove Audio heard about this? The latest book inspired by the Simpson case is “The Dog Is Talking,” which was written by Sibyl Graham “through careful translation from the canine to the English language.” It’s an Akita’s account of a June 12, 1994, double murder, told in the first person. First animal?