Introducing--the East L.A. Warehouse of Fame! As...

Introducing--the East L.A. Warehouse of Fame! As the whole world surely knows, the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce recently revealed that Metro Rail construction has necessitated the temporary removal of 450 stars from the Walk of Fame, including those of Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe and Barry Manilow.

The uprooted plaques will be stored in a warehouse in East L.A. “in a temperature-controlled atmosphere,” spokeswoman Ana Martinez-Holler said.

Mike Stevens has an alternate suggestion. “We’ll take ‘em,” said Stevens, the founder of the rival Fargo, N.D., Walk of Fame.

In its five-year history, Fargo has laid out concrete slabs on semi-world-famous First Avenue North for 93 visiting luminaries including singer Garth Brooks, televangelist Robert Schuller and tulip-tiptoer Tiny Tim.

“We’ve got plenty of room for more,” Stevens pointed out.

“We’d rather keep them close to us,” Martinez-Holler told Only in L.A., which gallantly acted as a go-between during Fargo’s unsuccessful bid.

“Did you say we’d promise to give them back?” Stevens said.

We knew we forgot something.

*

The Walk marches on: “We got phone calls from Japan and other countries asking whether we still have a Walk of Fame,” Martinez-Holler said. “Of course we do. We have about 1,500 stars left. And we’re putting 30 new ones in in June.”

She revealed--and this is an Only in L.A. exclusive--that the uprooted stars of Presley and Monroe would not be going to the East L.A. Warehouse of Fame.

“(Honorary Mayor) Johnny Grant decided they’ll be put in our new Gateway to Hollywood section (of the Walk of Fame),” she said.

Some fans of other uprooted celebs were miffed, including a group of fans who clean Barry Manilow’s star each month. Nevertheless, the singer’s plaque is going into storage. His fans are coping.

“They told us they’d clean Big Bird’s star in the meantime,” Martinez-Holler said.

*

Ah, the beauty of the English language: Radio station KLSX-FM is holding a May 19-22 exhibit titled “The Poetry of Rock”--and don’t you dare call Poetry of Rock an oxymoron! On display will be handwritten autographed lyrics from “popular music’s greatest” songs. We hope the station remembers to include these lyrical gems:

--”Alley oop oop. Oop. Oop oop. Alley oop oop. Oop. Oop oop” (sung by the Hollywood Argyles).

--”There she was justa walkin’ down the street, singin’ doo wah diddy diddy dum diddy do” (Manfred Mann).

--”Yummy yummy yummy. I’ve got love in my tummy” (Ohio Express).

--”One-eyed, one-horned, flying purple people-eater--sure looked good to me” (Sheb Wooley).

--”Papa oom mow mow. Papa oom mow mow.” (The Rivingtons).

--”That’s the way, uh huh, uh huh, I like it” (KC and the Sunshine Band).

--”Ain’t got a mudder. Ain’t got a fadder. I’m a lonely frog.” (Frogman Henry).

--”Wooly bully. Wooly bully. Wooly bully” (Sam the Sham & the Pharaohs).

--”Surfer Joe. Man, look at him go. Oh oh oh. Surfer, surfer surfer J-o-o-o-o-e” (Surfaris).

And, finally, we give you The Kingsmen:

--”Louie, Louie, me gotta go.”

miscelAny:

Reader Dave Kenney came upon the enclosed business card, which reminded us of Surfer Joe’s skin.