Opinion: Perhaps in an effort to stop earthquakes, Virginia attorney general covers breast in state seal

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Sure, it sounds like an Arnold Schwarzenegger movie: Tough-as-nails hero travels back through time to change a horrific error to save society’s collapse.

But in Virginia, this ain’t no movie. And the hero, played by Atty. Gen. Ken Cuccinelli, doesn’t need a hot tub time machine or any other time travel device to do it.

He’s just fixing the problem now. That problem?

The Virginia State Seal. Anyone who has seen it comes away horrified.

Created in the debauchery-plagued period known as the Revolutionary War era, the seal shows the Roman goddess Virtus (virtue). But just how virtuous is she? Her left breast is exposed.

‘Like she’s performing in a Super Bowl halftime show,’ writes outraged NBC reporter Matthew Stabley.

Our crazy forefathers let it slip. And the country’s been on a devastating free-fall ever since. Now there’s Motley Crue.

Until now. Cuccinelli is cracking down. He’s created a new lapel pin. This one corrects the wardrobe malfunction by placing an armored breastplate in front of Virtus’ bosom.

‘When the new design came up at a staff meeting, workers in attendance said Cuccinelli joked that it converts a risque image into a PG one,’ reports Julian Walker at the Virginian-Pilot.

Reportedly no state funds were used to create the new pin. Surely, not for long though. With an Iranian cleric’s recent declaration that women who dress suggestively increase the likelihood of earthquakes, who wouldn’t want taxpayer monies used for public safety?

-- Jimmy Orr

partially disrobed Roman goddess Virtus is seen on the Virginia State Seal. Credit: Wikipedia

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