Yet contrary to marry

This past week, Roman Catholic bishops meeting in Rome reaffirmed the church’s ban on married priests, despite an increasing shortage of priests. How might allowing married priests alter the dynamic of the church and the ways that priests interact with and lead their congregations? There is a very specific dynamic attached to being a priest that appears to be part of a larger picture of what it means to be Catholic. Of course, it would make it easier if priests could be married, but being a Catholic priest means, in some important way, being married to the church. This very established tradition would require an enormous mental shift that would probably alienate too many Catholics. For this reason, I don’t think letting a priest be married is the answer. However, the church could create a new kind of lay leader who could fulfill many of the duties of a Catholic priest and still be married.

SENIOR PASTOR

JAMES TURRELL

Center for Spiritual Discovery

Costa Mesa

It has long been a frustration of those of us in the body of Christ that our Roman Church brethren insist on perpetuating a church concerned more about tradition, power and control rather than a church that values and understands people. Among the 50 recommendations that the synod of bishops made were a list of exclusions from the life of the church based on past sin. Is there no place in the body of Christ for someone who has been divorced or was a thief? Isn’t the message of the Gospel a message of hope and restoration? The synod’s recommendations reaffirm the Roman Church’s lack of concern and faith in and for its own people.

Certainly, the Apostle Paul mentions that a single person has more ability to dedicate time and resources to their ministry than a married person, but he does not exclude a married person. Eastern Rite Catholics, loyal to the Pope, allow priests to marry, but exclude them from being bishops. This, though far short of enough, is a far more reasonable policy. We must understand the history of celibacy in the priesthood. During the Roman persecution of Christ-followers, many were martyred for their faith. Martyrs were held up as heroes. When Christianity became the official religion of the Roman Empire, it also became the popular thing to convert to Christianity. Soon, instead of martyrs, the churches were full of people who converted for social expediency. In response, a new martyrdom developed as many devout believers fled to the deserts under a self-imposed martyrdom, living meagerly and giving up all worldly possessions, dying to self. These monks became quite a force in church politics. Their piety was honored with positions of authority within the church. Soon, all the seats of church authority were limited exclusively to monastics. As time went on, this bias toward the spirituality of the celibate over the spirituality of the married has become ingrained in Roman church culture and psyche.

Opening the doors would bring a fresh wind of change and respectability to the Roman church. The clergy would no longer be seen as such a different class of people, but then could be role models as godly fathers and husbands, as well as shepherds. The average person cannot live in a monastery and spend the time in prayer and Bible study that monks are afforded. And because they don’t have wives and children, often their advice is seen as so otherworldly that it is not practical for the person who lives and works “in the real world.” Though having young children has slowed down my ability to be 100% available, I am still available to the people of our congregation around the clock. Having a wife has doubled the effectiveness of my ability to serve and reach out to people. For many years, I thought I would be most effective as a single minister, but when I met my wife, it was clear that my ministry would suffer without her as a partner.

SENIOR ASSOCIATE

PASTOR RIC OLSEN

Harbor Trinity

Costa Mesa

God calls each of us to serve others in this world in varieties of ways and gives us gifts of ability and enthusiasm for doing what he calls us to do.

There must be some criteria for determining who can be a leader in holy ministries and who cannot. Gender and marital status, both of which are God’s gifts, are much more objective than criteria such as those for a priest given on page 531 of our Book of Common Prayer: “to proclaim the Gospel by word and deed... to love... caring alike for young and old, strong and weak, rich and poor... to preach and declare God’s forgiveness to penitent sinners, to pronounce God’s blessing...” It is difficult to determine whether or not a person can be who a priest must be. It is much easier to determine whether or not a man is married.

Certainly there are men and women, persons who are single or married or divorced or widowed, celibate or in relationships including or excluding sexual expression, of wonderfully diverse faith commitments who respond to God’s call to serve others in the world. Each and all bring different life experiences into leadership within religious communities. Having leaders with varieties of gifts and experiences representing all manners and conditions of humankind enriches God’s people.

Personally, I knew early on that I was called both to serve God in faithful communities and to be a husband and dad. I gladly “officiated” at ritualized burials of neighborhood pets, and when kids “played wedding,” I was equally glad to be either officiant or groom. I was equally attracted to worship in church as I was to female classmates; I dreamed of having a child and trying to be as good a father as my dad was. I would not be the “Father Haynes” I am without being “Don’s dad.” I appreciate how exceedingly blessed I am to be a priest and a husband and a dad.

Thirty years ago, when it looked like both would be possible in our lifetimes, a Jesuit priest bet me “one good dinner” that married men would be ordained before single women in his Roman Catholic Church. He recently telephoned me to lament that he now thought neither would happen in his or my lifetime (at least another thirty years) and to call off our bet and ask that we have that dinner together anyway. With my Jesuit friend I lament that single and married men and women cannot bring their variety of gifts and experiences to Holy Orders in the Roman Catholic Church.

I rejoice that all servants of God can serve in all orders of ministry in the Anglo- Catholic/Anglican/Episcopal Church.

(THE VERY REV’D CANON)

PETER D. HAYNES