‘Valiant’ salutes animals

“Valiant” means courageous, especially in the new Disney/Vanguard

film. “Valiant” is the perfect name for a young pigeon (voiced by

Ewan McGregor, lately of “Star Wars” fame), who is also sweet, honest

and true, and longs to serve his country well in World War II.

Unfortunately for us, we’re given much too little time with

Valiant, and too much time with a parade of almost 20 other

characters, in a lifeless, confused, mishmash of 50 different war

movie cliches -- like the nurse/girlfriend meeting the new recruit;

or the alluring French Resistance fighter named Charles De Girl.

Whatever is left of this movie is taken up with jokes that stopped

being funny 60 years ago. The film is both too much and not enough.

It’s as if the audience is asked to sit through an impromptu play put

on a by a large group of 4-year-olds.

No doubt the kids have a lot of charm individually -- but

together?

Unsupervised? For 90 minutes?

“Valiant” was meant to acknowledge the great bravery shown by

animals who served in wartime, many of whom received the “Dickin”

Medal.

As a side note, “Dickin” Medals are still being passed out,

recently to dogs who helped save lives during Sept. 11 in New York.

All of which goes to show that the best of intentions do not a story

make.

“Valiant” is also a tribute to the kind of movie that Hollywood

lovingly cranked out in the 1940s during the war years -- great

action-adventure films like “A Yank in the R.A.F.” with Tyrone Power,

or “Destination Tokyo” with Cary Grant. Story writer George Webster

seems to have a good heart, but hasn’t found a safe place to put it

yet. He has loaded “Valiant” with so many obscure World War II

references, that anyone born after 1960 (especially those under 11

years of age), will probably be staring blankly at the screen for

more than half the movie. And anyone born before 1960 will be staring

blankly at the screen for different reasons.

It was very wise of the producers and directors to get such superb

voice talent as McGregor, Tim Curry, Jim Broadbent and John Hurt. It

was unwise not to give any of these wonderful actors anything

interesting or original to do. Even an actor as bone-deep funny as

John Cleese can’t raise a chuckle. One of the funniest bits was a

pigeon belching to the letters of the alphabet. Enough said?

* MARY BURKIN works at a Glendale law office and enjoys sharing

the gift of entertainment with her daughters.