Donning the white dress
Alicia Robinson
Being a debutante isn’t all white gloves and formal dances.
Those are the fun parts that have to be earned through hard work.
Just ask Mary Pat Lucas. Or her mother. Or her daughter.
Being presented as a debutante is a final rite of passage for
girls in the National Charity League, but those who belong to the
organization say its most important parts are the philanthropy and
volunteer work they do to get to be a debutante. Founded in 1925 in
Los Angeles as the Charity League, the organization is devoted to
helping the community and fostering mother-daughter relationships.
This year’s group of debutantes includes two third-generation
members involved with the league’s local chapter. Lucas and her
mother, Kathy Rolfes, worked with the National Charity League when
Lucas was a girl. Kamdyn Lucas, Mary Pat’s daughter, just finished
her service as a “Ticktocker” and got to don the white dress of a
debutante.
Joyce Ukropina is the middle link in her family’s chain of
National Charity League women. Her mother, Nancy Caldwell, was a
“patroness” when Ukropina was presented in 1971. Joyce’s daughter,
Jillian Ukropina, made her debut in November.
“I started as a Ticktocker when I was in seventh grade,” Mary Pat
Lucas said. “That was a long time ago.”
Back then, she worked as a candy-striper at the local hospital,
did activities with deaf children at the former John Tracy Clinic in
Costa Mesa and spent time with folks at the senior center.
“I think probably the biggest thing I learned was how wonderful it
was to help other people,” Mary Pat Lucas said. “Not only did it make
them happy, but to know that I helped someone have a better day in
some way, made their life better for them.”
Joyce Ukropina also worked at the John Tracy Clinic and raised
money for charity in the Ticktocker thrift shop. Being able to help a
variety of causes appealed to her, she said.
“The neat thing about National Charity League is it doesn’t just
work with one charity,” she said.
Caldwell said she was drawn to the organization by its values and
the mother-daughter involvement.
“Having two daughters, I just couldn’t think of a better way to
watch my girls grow from being a little girl into womanhood,” she
said. “What it has really shown my daughters and now my granddaughter
is to be involved in the community and giving of yourself.”
Both Mary Pat Lucas and Joyce Ukropina said they suggested the
National Charity League to their daughters, who took the idea and ran
with it.
“[Jillian] got involved primarily because I had sought the
involvement out myself,” Joyce Ukropina said. “I had such an
incredible experience going through this with my mother and my
sister, I knew this was something I wanted to go through with my
daughter.”
The latest generation of Ticktockers has worked with local soup
kitchens, Share Our Selves, the Environmental Nature Center and other
groups. Kamdyn Lucas said the best part of her volunteer work was
helping children.
“A lot of my service hours that I did were with kids, and my
favorite thing is to work with kids and be with kids and make them
happy,” she said.
The community has changed since Mary Pat Lucas and Joyce Ukropina
first got involved with the National Charity League, and their
perspectives on the group have changed also, they said.
“Probably as a child I understood that there was a need, but now
as an adult I can see how much need there really is,” Mary Pat Lucas
said.
As the community has grown, so has the need for the work the
league does, she said.
At long last, after all the volunteer work -- Mary Pat Lucas said
Kamdyn contributed 748 hours of time to the community -- came that
fairy tale moment, when the girls were presented as debutantes at a
ball held by the Newport Beach chapter of the National Charity
League.
Seeing Kamdyn presented in November was an unforgettable moment
for Mary Pat Lucas, herself a National Charity League debutante in
1974.
“That’s one you can’t even describe,” she said. “I expected it to
be wonderful, but seeing her up there and the night as a whole so
exceeded my expectations. It was absolutely a magical night. It made
me see how grown up my daughter was and how she’s moved on to the
next stage of life.”
Joyce Ukropina cried when she saw her daughter Jillian presented
in a white dress.
“It was an incredible culmination of a lot of hard, hard work that
she had done,” Joyce Ukropina said.
Her daughter is now a student at USC who uses her spare time to
tutor inner-city students in Los Angeles.
Kamdyn Lucas said the ball was old-fashioned, but that didn’t
bother her.
“I was so excited,” she said. “I’ve been waiting for it since the
sixth grade. ... It was awesome wearing the whole get-up.”
She’s kept up her volunteer work and now acts as service
chairwoman for her sorority at the University of Arizona. While she
does expect to encourage her daughters, if she has any, to
participate in the National Charity League, her decision to go
through it wasn’t influenced by family tradition, she said.
“I could have stopped a while ago if I didn’t want to do it
anymore, but I liked it so much and I thought it was just a great
experience, so I wanted to keep doing it,” she said.
* ALICIA ROBINSON covers business, politics and the environment.
She may be reached at (949) 764-4330 or by e-mail at alicia.robinson@
latimes.com.
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